My Books

I own the largest collection of books in the region. It’s so big that I have to keep the books stored in separate warehouses. Whenever I need one of them I go to the nearest storage facility and look up the book’s location in a large computer database.

Because my warehouses have so many more books than I could ever make use of on my own, I share my vast collection with anyone who wants to use them. They just “check” the books out from one of the warehouses so that I can keep track of where all my books are.

At least that’s how I pretend the local library system works. The fantasy breaks down when they call and tell me that I have overdue fines. Then I just pretend that I'm renting the books and that the escalating fine is actually a rental fee.